How To Be More Feminine -10 Unique Ways

how to be more feminine
Lana Otoya

Are you interested in learning how to be more feminine? Maybe you want to feel more confident in your skin, be more attractive, or maybe you have your eyes on a special someone and you’d like to impress him.

Whatever the reason, femininity is a powerful strength that all women should use to their advantage.

Now, before you start doubting this – remember that “femininity” has nothing to do with “feminism” or the rights of women. Of course, women deserve equal rights in all aspects of life!

So then, what exactly is being feminine? How can you add this powerful energy to your life?

Here is your guide on how to be more feminine.

Related: How To Make Him Miss You Like Crazy

#10 – Know What Feminine Energy is “Not”

The first step in being more feminine is understanding exactly what it is…And sometimes the best way to know what something is, is to find out what it is not.

So then, feminine energy is not about:

  • The way your body looks
  • The way you do your hair or makeup
  • What clothes you wear

In other words, it’s not about superficial things or stereotypes about women. Instead, it is an energy, or a lifestyle. It is the way you carry yourself throughout life.

An excellent way to picture this is to take the stereotype of a flamboyant gay man. He’s happy-go-lucky, funny, confident and easy to talk to. You could even describe him as “feminine”.

But does it matter that he’s not wearing a dress? Does it matter that he doesn’t have makeup or long hair?


None of that really matters, yet he still has feminine energy, regardless of his gender.

You can see clearly that being feminine is all about the way you carry yourself.

This is the first step in understanding that feminine energy is all about an “attitude” or “energy” that you not only give off when you’re around others, you also feel it within yourself.

Related: How To Let Go Of Negative Thoughts

#9 – Know The Differences Between Masculine and Feminine

Now, in order to start truly understanding how to be more feminine, we must compare it to the opposite, which is “masculine.”

Here is a little chart to help you see the difference:

Masculine Feminine
Logical ThoughtIntuitive Feeling
Decisive ActionCreativity

Now, if you look at the masculine side, you can see that society rewards many of these traits with success and money. Achieving your goals, controlling your destiny, and being competitive to stand out and get to the top.

These are qualities based in masculine energy.

If you’re like most modern women, you’ve likely used these traits to be successful in work or school. \

You have worked hard and set big goals and you achieved them! You have an established career, a good social life and financial stability.

But what about the other side of the chart? The feminine side? There’s value in that side too, society just tends to push it aside…

#8 – Understand the Value of Being Feminine

If you look at the feminine side of the chart, two of the most important traits you’ll see are “senses” and “experiencing.”

In a nutshell, these traits equal “enjoyment of life”. Your senses allow you to breathe in the fresh air, see the beauty in nature, taste delicious food, and listen to beautiful music.

All your senses lead to “experiencing life”.

While the masculine side is always focused on “getting to the next step” or “reaching the next goal,” the feminine takes her time, experiences the beauty around her, and really enjoys life in the present moment.

This way of living will lead to less stress, less anxiety and an overall higher enjoyment of life.

Related: Rumination: How To Stop Overthinking

#7 – Be The Passenger, Not The Driver

A great way to look at this is to imagine your life as though you are on a road trip.

The masculine side of you is the driver, the one planning the route and making sure that you get to the next destination.

The feminine side is the passenger, the person looking out the window, taking in the view and singing along to the music in the car.

The passenger (or the feminine side) is the one enjoying life without a care in the world.

With this explanation, the value of feminine energy becomes extremely obvious. You absolutely need it to enjoy your life and appreciate what you have.

This includes all aspects of your life, including insecurities or struggle.

#6 – Develop an Inner Confidence

If you want to learn how to be more feminine, you must understand that femininity is all about your “inner world.”

While the masculine is focused on outer accomplishments like career promotions and financial success, the feminine is all about what’s going on inside.

It’s about mental health. Inner peace. Gratitude. And yes, confidence.

Confidence, despite flaws. Everyone has flaws, but it’s about overcoming them and seeing the beauty in even your worst flaws or life circumstances.

The masculine is always trying to “improve”. Trying to be the best and show others that you’re the best.

The feminine is about acceptance. Accepting yourself, your accomplishments and how far you have come.

Acceptance is easier said than done, I know. But working on this inner peace and confidence will help you be more care-free, connect with other people, and be more feminine.

Related: How To Be Confident Enough To Attract Your Soul-Mate

#5 – Accept Your Body

Being more feminine is all about accepting and loving your body.

It has nothing to do with chiseled abs or a slim figure that you see on Victoria’s Secret models.

True femininity is understanding that your body is sexy, beautiful, and inherently attractive to men simply because it is a female body.

Take a look at this very feminine photo.

In it, you can see the beauty, sex appeal, and femininity in this woman – and the chiseled abs are missing from the photo!

Now, you might think that because this painting is “old” means that the standards of beauty have changed, but studies show time and time again that how a person acts, is so much more important to attractiveness than how they look.

See this quote from the science of people:

Of course, we can be physically attracted to someone, but we are more often drawn to their confidence, passion, and personality. Being attractive is about more than just appearance.

While there is a “certain look” required to be a model or a fitness influencer, regular men appreciate women with all types of bodies, as long as they are confident, happy with their lives, and generally enjoyable to be around.

As a matchmaker, I spoke to hundreds of single men, and although they all wanted a woman they were “attracted to”, that standard of attractiveness changed from man to man.

At the end of the day, they just wanted someone with magnetic energy that made them feel happy about life.

Related: 10 Traits of A High-Quality Man

#4 – Find Your Own Feminine

This takes us into a very specific type of feminine, and that is finding yours.

Everyone is unique so femininity will shine through in different ways for everyone.

When you look at someone like Queen Latifah, you can see that she has a love for life and a nurturing confidence about her.

This is her feminine charm.

Yes, she’s overweight, but she dresses in a way that makes her look put-together and probably makes her feel confident and sexy. She’s clearly confident in her own skin and body so the size of her body doesn’t matter at all.

She’s a beautiful woman!

When you think about your clothing, remember that it doesn’t matter what you’re wearing, but it does matter how you wear it.

The clothes you wear should be a statement. They should state your personality and be “intentional.”

Look at someone like Billie Eilish, who has perfected the art of baggy hoodies, sweatpants and green hair. While someone might tell you “that’s not feminine”, one look at Billie EIlish performing on stage and showing off her talent to the world will change your mind.

Her confidence, elegance and talent as a unique individual shines through because the clothes she’s wearing are intentional.

She wants to wear them because they make her feel good. They make her unique.

Whatever clothing or hairstyle you choose to go with, make sure it’s intentional and that it’s the person you want to be.

This is how you can be uniquely feminine and give off that confident feminine charm wherever you go.

#3 – Have Feminine Triggers

Modern society has taught all women that in order to be successful, they need to “be like men.”

They need to be assertive, hide their emotions at work, competitive, self-reliant and make a lot of money.

While all of this stuff is good, it’s easy to forget about your feminine side when you’re at work surrounded by men and trying to be “one of the guys.”

Instead, try to have some “feminine triggers” that remind you of your femininity.

For some women, this is getting their nails done or buying a new dress. For others, it’s lighting a candle, meditating, or dancing.

Find the things that make you feel more in tune with your feminine side, and use them as “triggers” to unleash the feminine side of you every single day.

Free Guide: How To Use Femininity To Attract Higher-Quality Men

#2 – Accept Your Sex Appeal

Because women have been sexually objectified for centuries, we often think of our sex appeal as a bad thing.

We look down at women who use their sex appeal for monetary gain (like models or even a flirty co-worker).

Instead of looking down at other women and pushing down your own sex appeal, be proud of it.

As a dating coach, I’ve had clients who work in a male-dominated industry, and purposefully cover up their body and wear unflattering clothes.

It’s such a shame that society has programmed us to be this way. We think that if we show off our bodies or our sex appeal, that we won’t be seen as equals in the workplace.

While you have to do what you have to do at work to be successful, you don’t have to take this attitude to all aspects of your life.

Women who push down their sexuality so much at work, find it hard to bring it back out again when it comes to dating or trying to attract a man.

Instead, of trying to hide the fact that you’re a beautiful woman, be proud of it.

Remind yourself that you’re sexy, attractive and have sexual desires of your own. This is only natural, and is a great way to feel comfortable in your own skin!

#1 – Attract Masculine Men

Once you have all of the above steps, you’ll be attracting masculine men in no time!

There is a very important law of relationships and that is the law of “polarity”.

Polarity is when the opposite “poles” are attracted to each other. Just like a magnet has positive and negative poles, relationships have masculine and feminine.

The more you’re in tune with your feminine side, the more easily you’ll attract higher-quality masculine men.

If you want to learn more about this, download my free guide on how women can attract higher-quality men.

How To Attract A Man That Is High Quality

I hope you found this article helpful. I strongly believe in the power of feminine energy to attract higher-quality men and to reach inner feminine strength.

Learn more about attracting men with feminine energy in my guide “How To Attract Higher-Quality Men”.


Thanks for checking out my article on “How to Be More Feminine”. Remember that feminine energy is all about an attitude and a way of carrying yourself through life rather than wearing certain clothes.

Good luck in life and love!

Love your favorite dating coach,


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