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Signs He Loves You In Bed

Are you feeling nervous about your relationship? Let’s be honest, you wouldn’t be here if you knew your man was head over heels for you – so what gives? Why have you landed on this page?

signs he loves you in bed

Maybe The Problem Is Him…

Maybe he’s not showing you the love and affection you crave in bed. Or maybe the problem is you – maybe you’re feeling insecure and are projecting those feelings onto him.

It could also be your first serious relationship and you’re not exactly sure what loving sex is supposed to look or feel like.

Well, I’m here to help. Let’s break down what a man will do with you in bed if he’s really in love. Here are the top 12 signs he loves you in bed.

12 Signs He Loves You In Bed

#12 — He Looks You In the Eye

The first major sign that he loves you in bed is if he looks you in the eye while you’re getting down and dirty.

By holding intense or prolonged eye contact, he’s showing his deep appreciation and connection with you, which allows you to feel seen or reassured.

This also shows that he is willing to be vulnerable while in a relationship. When a man looks you in the eye, he risks you looking away and thus feeling rejected. I know that sounds subtle, but remember body language is 75% of the way humans communicate with each other.

If he’s looking in your eyes while you have sex, it shows that he is present in the moment and wants to share that moment with you.

If you share the same feelings of love for him, as a strong feminine woman you will also give him eye contact back. It can be hard to do this sometimes, especially if you struggle with being vulnerable in relationships. If you struggle with doing this, it could be a little bit of insecurity or a lack of inner feminine strength.

Related: 15 Signs He Wants A Serious Relationship

#11 — He Wants to Make It an Experience

Have you noticed that your man doesn’t just want a quickie whenever he has you alone?

Perhaps he’s keen to wine and dine you first by taking you to your favorite restaurant. Or maybe he puts on romantic music beforehand and starts slow dancing with you.

Either way, if he amps up the romance, this is a definite indicator that he wants to make love to you as opposed to just having sex.

Free Guide: Attracting Higher-Quality Men Using Feminine Energy

#10 — He Slowly Undresses You

Men who are in lust and not in love can’t get their clothes off fast enough.

On the other hand, a guy in love will undress you slowly so he can appreciate every inch of your body. He may even spend more time holding you, touching you, and kissing you compared to the average sexual encounter.

If he’s taking his time undressing you, it shows that he is in no rush to wham bam thank you mam and he actually enjoys spending this time with you in bed.

Related: Lust Vs. Love – 5 Ways To Know The Passion Will Last

#9 — He’s Focused On Your Pleasure

Sure, the aim of having sex is for both parties to gain pleasure. Although, a guy who loves you will want to make sure you’re having a good time.

Maybe he asks you how he can help if you haven’t already climaxed or he uses his hands or mouth to make you climax more than once.

Regardless, he makes your pleasure a priority—even if it means that his own pleasure takes a backseat.

Now before we move on from this point, I just want to make this clear. If a man is unable to make you climax, it doesn’t mean he doesn’t love you or that he’ll never be able to.

As a dating coach, I often hear my clients tell me that the man they are seeing is great in every way, but struggles to make them orgasm in the bedroom. This is where good communication and your ability to help guide him come into play.

The key here is he must be making an effort to make you climax, and if he can’t make it happen the first few times, there’s nothing wrong with helping him out. In fact, it’s another great way to see if he loves you in bed.

If he’s willing to listen to your needs and is happy to change up his normal routine in order to please you – that’s a huge sign he loves you!

Related: How Many Dates Before You Have Sex?

#8 — Sex Lasts a Long Time

Following on the previous point, perhaps the entire time you’re having sex has started to add up because he’s so adamant about pleasing you.

Whether it involves lots of foreplay or switching positions, a prolonged time in the sack suggests that he’s making love to you and he wants you to enjoy the experience as much as possible.

How come? Well, he clearly likes you and wants to make sure you’re happy.

Related: What Makes A Good Husband? 10 Traits of High-Quality Men

#7 — He’s Constantly Making Out With You

Someone who’s in love won’t just do sexual things to their partner in bed—they will want to show their love in other ways.

It’s like our old friend Betty Everett sang: “If you want to know if he loves you so, it’s in his kiss.”

In other words, a man who makes out with you a lot during lovemaking is a man who wants to stick around for the long term.

Related: Does He Love Me? 15 Clear Signs

#6 — He Enjoys All of Your Body

The truth is, men who are in lust, not love may prefer to grab your butt or get straight down to the penetration.

However, men who are in in love will be so much more interested in appreciating the entirety of your body rather than just climaxing.

In fact, that would be the last thing on his mind!

Related: 14 Essential Qualities Of A Good Man

#5 — He Listens to Your Needs

Another sign he loves you in bed is if he meets your emotional and sexual needs.

For example, maybe you’ll only have sex if the lights are turned off. Or perhaps you don’t want him to touch a certain part of your body. Regardless, he’s totally okay with whatever you tell him.

And this makes you feel respected and comfortable with him at all times.

Free Guide: Attracting Higher-Quality Men With Feminine Energy

#4 — He Tries to Ease Your Hang-Ups

A strong masculine man who is ready for a serious relationship will want to make sure you feel loved. This means he will never criticize or make negative comments about your body – ever.

If he loves you, he will try his best to reassure you on everybody hang-up you might have in the bedroom.

Truth be told, he will boost your confidence by complimenting you and regularly telling how you beautiful you are.

Related: Why Is He Acting Distant All of A Sudden?

#3 — He Wants a Post-Coital Cuddle

After sex, does he get up and get dressed straight away or hop in the shower? Or does he want to lay naked with you and have a cuddle?

If it’s the latter, this shows how much he actually cares about you. He’s not eager to get on with his day. Instead, he wants to hang out and spend more time with you.

And if he wants to stay the night and spend the next morning with you – that’s an even bigger sign that he truly wants to be a serious boyfriend and not just a fling.

Remember, men who want to be boyfriends act like boyfriends.

Related: Lust Vs. Love – 5 Ways To Know The Passion Will Last

#2 — He’s Passionate

Let me ask you a question: is he intense during sex?

If so, it may be because he sees it as a big deal. There’s a lot of emotion behind the act (on his part at least), which can make him come across as overly passionate or excited.

Related: Law Of Polarity In Relationships

#1 — You Can Have a Laugh

Lastly, another major sign that he loves you in bed is if you can have a laugh and be silly together.

For instance, you may giggle at an awkward position or make a funny face at each other during a particularly serious moment.

Why? Well, having humor in the bedroom is a good thing. It shows that the two of you get along on another level rather than just sexual. 

Related: 15 Differences Between Love and “In Love”

How to Show Him You Love Him in Bed

If you’ve read through this list and you think your man has been showing you that he loves you in bed, you might want to show him that the feeling is mutual. After all, it may encourage him to vocalize his love sooner rather than later.

Here’s how to show him you love him in bed.

Related: How To Be More Feminine – 10 Unique Ways

Romance Him

Firstly, avoid letting him take charge of all the romance. Instead, find ways to be romantic with him in bed.

According to Cosmopolitan, this could consist of:

  • Whispering sweet things, such as “I really like you” or “you turn me on so much” to let your guy know how zoned in you are on him
  • Tenderly touching him all over, especially in surprising spots like his face, jawline, collarbone, and inner thighs
  • Holding him post-sex and basking in the afterglow
  • Having pillow talk, where you open up to each other about personal experiences and show vulnerability

You could also put on romantic music pre-sex, light a bunch of candles and sprinkle a bunch of rose petals on the bed to effectively set the mood.

Related: How To Flirt With A Guy -10 Ways to Build Chemistry

Ask Him What He Likes

Another way you can show the intensity of your feelings during sex is to make his pleasure a priority.

Ask him what he likes (and actually listen) so you can do more of it to deepen your sexual connection (and connection in general). After all, good communication in and out of the bedroom is the secret to a long-lasting, fulfilling relationship.

According to Psychology Today, other ways you can boost communication in the bedroom include:

  • Telling him what you like in simple terms
  • Showing him what you like if he needs a helping hand
  • Offering resources for him to study, such as erotic literature and movies

Learning to talk about sex can feel embarrassing to start with, but the benefits far outweigh the discomfort. Trust me.

Related: How To Trigger The Hero Instinct in Men

So Why Are You Overthinking It?

Now that you’ve seen the signs he loves you in bed, let me ask you – why were you overthinking it? Do you feel like he wasn’t showing you the right signs or are you just feeling a little insecure?

As a dating coach for strong independent women, one of the biggest lessons I teach is how to have inner feminine strength.

This is the kind of strength that allows you to feel strong, worthy and secure in yourself while dating.

I know you probably feel confident in other aspects of your life, but dating is where things seem to fall apart.

If you struggle with feeling worthy and confident in romantic relationships, you’re not alone. A lot of successful and independent women struggle with this.

Free Guide: Attracting Higher-Quality Men With Feminine Energy

Learn More About Using Feminine Energy To Attract Better Men

If you’re struggling with overthinking and anxiety in romantic relationships, you might need some help with feminine inner strength. You can use feminine energy to achieve this inner strength and attract higher-quality men.

Learn more about attracting men with feminine energy in my guide “How To Attract Higher-Quality Men”.


Sometimes it can be difficult to tell whether your man loves you in bed or not. That said, keep in mind that a guy can use the way he has sex to show love long before he says those three little words.

Now you know the tell-tale signs, be sure to watch out for them!

Love, your favorite dating coach.


Lana Otoya

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