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What He Thinks When You Ignore Him

You want to ignore him so you can get his attention right?

You want him to see that you’re not just waiting around for his texts – you have a life to live! While this is a good plan on paper, it doesn’t always play out that way.

What he thinks when you ignore him

Let Him Take The Lead

As a dating coach, I am a big believer in women taking a step back and letting the man take the lead. So I really do like your plan – even though it’s flawed 😉

I believe using your strong feminine energy to draw him in works very well. But does it still work if you flat out ignore him? Here is what he thinks when you ignore him.

#8 – You’re Really Busy

This will be the first thing that comes to his head.

“Ah, she’s probably just busy”.

If you’re working a lot or have a demanding job, this is the most obvious conclusion.

This is awesome!” you’re probably thinking. You totally want him to think that you’re a busy independent woman.

While that may work after one text, it won’t keep working the longer you ignore him.

If you ignore him for a full day and then he texts you again and you still don’t answer, then he won’t think you’re busy. He’ll think…

Related: If A Guy Doesn’t Text For A Week

#7 – It’s Rude

If you ignore more than one of his texts, he’s going to start thinking you’re rude.

Being rude is not attractive to men. Especially if you’re dealing with a high-quality man.

A high-quality man is emotionally stable and ready to settle down with a woman for the long-term. He’s doesn’t want to settle down with someone if he doesn’t feel heard and listened to.

Related: Lust Vs. Love – How To Know The Passion Will Last

#6 – You’re Seeing Other Men

If he gets jealous easily, he might think you’re seeing other men. If you are currently courting or “seeing each other” and you haven’t made things official, it’s not a bad thing for him to think you’re out with other men.

Him thinking you’re out there playing the field is good.

It makes him know that if he doesn’t take things to the next level, some other man might.

The increased pressure is a great way to get a man to take things to the next level. You don’t want him to think he has all the time in the world.

But ignoring him isn’t the best way to get this across…

Don’t Ignore Him, Keep Him Updated On Your Plans

If you like the idea of sparking his interest by making him feel like he’s not the only thing in your life, don’t just ignore him.

There are better ways to get him to feel the pressure.

If he texts you saying “hey, have you seen the new season of Game of Thrones?”.

Instead of ignoring him, say something like: “Haha no, but I was out with James the other night and he was talking about how it’s really good.”

That is a much more subtle way to get him thinking “hmm.. maybe I’m not the only guy in her life… maybe I should be.”

This is much more effective than ignoring!

Note: Something I have to say here is that you shouldn’t be manipulative. Don’t keep mentioning other men all the time or he will definitely get annoyed. Just use this once or twice and then stop.

Related: How Many Dates Before It’s Official?

#5 – You’re Not Interested

Another thing that can easily go through his head is that you’re just not interested.

In today’s modern dating world, texting is a huge way we build chemistry.

If you’re not good at texting, you might find yourself losing out on great relationships.

Your lack of texting might make him reach out. But instead of texting you, he might check Bumble to see if someone else is a little more interested!

Learn More about Texting: Text Chemistry Review

#4 – You Want His Attention

If you’re ignoring him on purpose, you probably want him to feel like he should be reaching out to you more. You want him to chase you.

But the funny thing is, some men can see right through this.

If he notices you’re ignoring him, he might sense that you’re playing hard to get and he might not want to play along. He might think “oh she just wants my attention.”

This is not what you want in a new relationship.

If you really are trying to get his attention, it’s better to do this by accepting his attempts to talk to you.

Dating expert John Keegan, interviewed by Elite Daily highlighted this:

“I do not recommend women ignore men they’re interested in. Absolutely not. If you really want to start a relationship off right, show that you’re interested,” explains Keegan. “Don’t play games. Once games begin, they never end and someone always loses in a game. In a relationship, we’re looking for a win win.”

Related: Signs A Guy Wants You To Chase Him

#3 – You’re Playing Games

Imagine him talking to his friends. He’s saying “first, she was all into it, she was texting me for hours and now she’s ignoring me.”

Do you think his friends are going to say “dude, that just means she wants you to text her MORE!”

No way.

Men don’t like things to be complicated. They don’t like mixed signals.

If you start playing games, he’s going to get frustrated easily.

It’s like being in one of those escape rooms and trying to figure out the clues. Sure, it’s fun when you’re with some nerdy friends, but it’s not fun when you’re not even sure if there’s a way out of this!

Related: How To Flirt With A Guy

#2 – You Don’t Need Him

High-quality men want to be providers. They are strong men who want to support their woman and take the lead.

If he is making the effort to reach out and talk to you, and all he gets is radio silence, he’s going to think you don’t need him.

Men want to feel needed.

They want to feel like the big strong man that can come in and save you.

I know it sounds cheesy, but this is the primal instinct that men have been developing for millions of years.

Your primal feminine instinct is to accept his advances. In the cavemen days, this mean accepting the tiger he just hunted for dinner. Today, this means answering his text.

Of course you don’t want to do this with just any man. You don’t have to accept the advances of a man who you don’t like.

But if you want to make things work and you want a relationship with him, make him feel like he is needed and welcome into your life.

Related: How To Attract A Man And Keep Him Interested

#1 – You Won’t Make A Good Girlfriend

The final thing that he things if you ignore him is that you won’t make a good girlfriend.

Emotionally stable are the exact opposite of emotionally unavailable men. This means that they want to engage with you and they want to share.

They want back and forth communication.

If he feels like this relationship just became really one-sided, he’s not going to make the effort.

Ignoring a great guy will frustrate him.

So, now that we have gone through the main things he thinks when you ignore him, let’s answer some common questions.

Related: How To Be A Better Girlfriend- What High-Quality Men Want

Should I Ignore Him To Get His Attention?

No. Pulling back so that he can step up and take the lead is one thing, ignoring is another. There’s a big difference. Let’s break it down.

Ignoring him means that he’s trying to make the effort, and you’re not responding.

So he is texting you. But you don’t text back. He calls you, but you don’t answer.

The opposite of this is pulling back. Pulling back simply means that you stop being the first person to reach out. You stop texting him first and calling him first.

The perfect balance

To balance the masculine and feminine energy, you must be willing to receive. Masculine energy is to give, feminine energy is to receive.

If you don’t receive the text and respond to it, you’re not being very feminine and this can turn off a high-quality man.

Free Checklist How To Attract Higher-Quality Men

Does Silence Make Him Miss You?

Yes. If you stop ignoring him, he might start to miss you, but he will also get frustrated. Emotionally stable men don’t want to play these games.

If he is secure within himself, he won’t keep chasing you if you keep ignoring him.

On the other hand, a man who is insecure might start to panic.

He might start thinking that he needs to try harder, and make you like him. So then, he will start texting you more and reaching out to you more.

So if ignoring your man is your way of getting him to chase you, it might work… but for the wrong kind of man.

You always want to make sure that you’re acting in a way that attracts high-quality.

How To Attract A Man That Is High Quality

Do you want to attract higher-quality men? Learn how in minutes with my Free Checklist “How To Attract Higher Quality Men”.


I hope you enjoyed my post on how to tell if a man is attracted to you but hiding it. Be sure to check out the free checklist and good luck on your dating efforts.

Love, your favorite dating coach.



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Lana Otoya

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